Clash of the Titans

Title: Clash of the Titans
Director: Louis Leterrier
Actors: Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes, Gemma Arterton

LOL!!! Clash of the Titans! LOL!!!

This was one hyped movie. It was supposed to be the beginning of the blockbuster season. Boy did it disappoint.

I stuck with the 2D version. For 3D you have to shell out more money (which I don't want to do) and you have to have a stronger tummy than me. I'm prone to motion sickness, so this whole 3D era is one I'm going to have to sit out. Sitting through the movie, it was quite obvious that it was intended to be seen in 3D. I'm sure some of the scenes would have been impressive had I had those goofy glasses on. As it was, I spent most of the time trying desperately to stifle inappropriate giggles.

I actually almost walked out of the movie in the beginning, that's how bad that part was. It was disjointed, stilted, and totally not cohesive. The characters were unappealing, even though the director tried really hard to make them so. When Perseus' family died... I was actually confused. They wen't from being on deck, watching a battle, to being trapped inside the hull when the ship was sinking.... Apparently Perseus was the only one who didn't magically transport himself inside at the right moment. At some point he was rescued. By whom, we don't know. And instead of just dropping him off in the city, his rescuers felt the need to take him to the castle and meet the king. And suddenly everyone knew his name and the fact that he was a demi-god. No clue how that happened. These jumps in knowledge without any kind of explanation continue for a good twenty minutes or so. I really wanted to walk out at that point. But, I was with someone and they wanted to stay.

After the first seriously bad act, we are led by our noses on a journey. Perseus, a lifelong fisherman, is taught to fight in a 2 minute scene where he bests a lifelong soldier. After that he is an expert soldier, bravely (read foolishly) going headfirst into battle. I guess my complaint here is that he was one cocky SOB for having just picked up a sword for the first time in his life. Also, not one ounce of believability.

I wish I could say that I cared about the characters, but I really didn't. They were flat, had absolutely no depth, and showed no development through the course of the movie.

All that being said, I give major props to the designers involved in the project. The special effects and makeup were amazing. The only two actors I recognized were Liam Neeson and Sam Worthington, despite the fact that the cast was full of actors I've seen and liked on previous occasions. Gemma Arterton (Quantum of Solace and St. Trinians) was mesmerizing. She was lovely and had the most to work with as far as character went. I didn't recognize her at all despite having watched her movies recently. I also didn't recognize Ray Fiennes, that's how good costume and makeup design was. Completely unrecognizable. So major props to those guys, whoever you may be.

All in all: You might as well go see it if you can stomach 3D (and the price). I'm sure it will amaze the senses. However, don't expect much. I laughed inappropriately (Sam Worthington and ninja skills with a sword from the gods; Hades and a creature having a near guy on guy makeout moment; up-skirt shots on the men). I can bet you that all involved watched the final product and went, "Oh no..."