The following are movies being released next month. I'll go through and give my initial impressions and predictions.
Beastly is the third movie to be released this season that's been based on a teen novel. The first was The Eagle and the second was I Am Number Four. Alex Pettyfer, who stars as the Beast in this one, also starred in I Am Number Four. Lucky guy.
I'm gunna go ahead and say this one's going to be just as average as the other two. First off, the Beast doesn't look very beastly. Even I could fall for a dude that looked like that, which kind of defeats the purpose. He's supposed to be hideous. I actually think he looks kind of like a piece of artwork; interesting, not ugly. Second, Vanessa Hudgens plays the girl he's supposed to fall for. In the book she was not a beauty. Didn't they already try this with her in High School Musical? Hasn't Hollywood learned that slapping on a pair of glasses does not make a girl "plain?" I am, however, looking forward to Neil Patrick Harris as the blind tutor (my favorite character in the book). He's got some good lines to work with. I'm definitely going to go see this one in theatre's but again, I expect it to be average.
Cloverfield meets War of the Worlds (the Tom Cruise version). And that's about it. I'm going to skip this one and wait for it to come out on DVD. This is mainly because I get motion sickness when the camera is handheld, a la Cloverfield. I actually started that one in the theatre but had to leave because the camera movement was making me nauseous. I did get to finish it at home, on my laptop a few months later. I'm sure it will be good, not great, but another good addition to the "alien's attack" genre.
FLOP!!! I can tell from a distance. Number 1 clue: It's directed by Catherine Hardwicke, the same woman who directed Twilight. And we all know how that came out. The trailer looks to be along the same lines; all visuals, no substance. I have no hope for this one. I'll probably head to the theatre in the middle of a workday about a week after it's release and ask one of the employees what they thought of it. This is how I escaped the gem "Wolfman" over the summer. Of course, instead of seeing that flop I went and saw "Legion" so that didn't really work out to my advantage. Yes, I am still bitter at having wasted $9 on that god-awful movie.
I'm not sure about this one. It seems kind of interesting, but not really up my alley. Ok, in all honesty, it doesn't appeal to me. When I think of what I've seen in the trailers, it comes across as a movie starring Matt Damon and Emily Blunt where they run a lot, holding hands, while Damon wears a silly hat, and they get chased by slightly weird dudes in more hats. I'm skipping this one on the claim that I don't want to spend $9 on something that will probably bore me. Plus, the only man alive that can pull off a hat like the one Damon wears in the movie, is Matt Bomer of White Collar.
I've only seen one preview for this and it wasn't a very long one. The basic premise is this: Bradley Cooper takes a pill that makes him smarter. Hijinks ensue? Other than the pill and brains I'm not sure what else happens. We shall see.
Matthew McConaughey is always either a surfer dude or a lawyer. Has anyone ever noticed that? Here he plays a lawyer hired to help a wealthy yuppie defendant (Ryan Phillipe) get out of a murder charge. Phillipe comes across as entirely creepy in the previews and McConaughey as increasingly desperate to prevent.... something. We aren't entirely sure yet based on the previews. If the previews can convey all of that, then I have a good feeling about this movie. I think it'll be good. Above average for sure.
Comedies like this can go one of two ways: they give away all their funny bits in the trailers and don't offer much else in theatres, or they are hysterically funny the whole way through. I'm seriously hoping for the latter since Simon Pegg stars. I love Simon Pegg. To reference his awesomeness: Hot Fuzz and Shaun of the Dead. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for this one.
Rango looks cute. Johnny Depp is actually pretty funny as well as a seriously good actor. I have no doubts this will be a good movie. I bet it'll be funny and provide humor for adults as well as kids. Definitely looking forward to this one.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! The whole premise makes me laugh out loud. I think people (read: horny men) will go see this because the cast is almost entirely hot young women in skimpy outfits with big guns (ahem). If you want a hint as to how bad it will be I direct your attention to the line at the top of the poster. It says, "A mind-bending vision of reality from the director of 'Watchmen' & '300'." Watchmen stunk. 300, the first of it's kind, visually stunning, but also kinda stinky. To me this is Zack Snyder creating his own masturbatory material. Seriously. I'm skipping this one. Again, I have no desire to waste my money on something so blatantly exploitive. Now, some of you might say, "But he's created a strong female lead." Yeah, no. If you want to see what a real strong-female-lead looks like, look at the creations of Joss Whedon and J.J. Abrams.
That is all.
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